The Elevated Places

Kathem Al Saher, Albniya

2007-02-15T19:44:00.000-08:00


Kathem Al Saher

2006-11-15T19:46:00.000-08:00

I never post, I know, I am a terrible person. Right now I am in the library, mentally preparing myself for a few hours of studying for my physics exam. It's not a difficult course at all, especially since I took AP physics in high school, but I kinda push this class aside and try to concentrate on o-chem. and genetics. I am definitely ready to be finished with them (although o-chem. II is going to be eleventy trillion times harder...).

I grew up in a small town where we were the only Muslim family, so coming to college and becoming active in MSA has been awesome. But, on some aspects, I feel even more alone. Last year, during Muharram I felt incredibly isolated with no one to commemorate the tragedy of Karbala with me. Now I do not even care. More than anything, I hate that the ummah is so divided, I want us all to accept one another and follow the Qur'an, which tells us not to divide ourselves and that Allah is the one who will judge on that which we differ. The world and its ways are very wearying to me lately. Sectarian division and discord are killing us, killing our humanity and the innocence and hope of our children. I want to do something, but I feel like a lone voice crying out against a torrential storm, and my words are drowned in the wind.

The weight of my sense of responsibility bears down on me. Sometimes, all I can do is whisper, over and over, "HasbiyAllahu wa na'mal wakeel." And, for a few moments, the burden is lightened; I can breathe.

~peace in the middle east~
zayneb

2006-10-23T22:46:00.000-07:00

Eid Mubarak!!!

2006-10-09T22:27:00.000-07:00

One of the most distressing issue facing Islam, to me, is the division and discord that pervades the Ummah. Yes, the social problems need to rectified; yes, extremism needs to be explicitly condemned. But the thing is, as long as we are all divided and arguing with one another, we cannot even address these issues, let alone take adequate steps to resolve them.Why can't we just respect each other's beliefs? Why can't we listen to the Qur'an when it tells us not to divide ourselves? Why do people care more about the stupid cartoons or the Pope's comments than the multitudinous masses of Muslims living in deplorable conditions? The Qur'an speaks more against oppression and injustice than it does against disrespect to Islam. In fact, it says to NOT argue ceaselessly with those who show such ignorance.Their actions and words in this case barely dignify a response.So let's all just get along and play nicely.

2006-09-24T10:29:00.000-07:00

Sooooooooo........it's been forEVER since I posted. I had an excellent, busy summer working and taking a class in addition to the usual things. I started classes again a month ago and am swamped with my premed courses. Organic chemistry and Genetics are trying to ruin my dreams, but I shall, inshaAllah, prevail. Though technically a sophomore, I am a junior in credit hours; I really doubt that I will graduate a year early because I have quite a few classes to take before the MCAT, but hopefully a semester early will be possible. That is actually quite a feat, considering most college students are taking 5 or more years to complete a 4-year program these days. It's just so difficult to take enough hours to graduate in addition to being active in groups and clubs and working (and partying, I suppose, for some)....at 3:30 this morning I was rudely awakened by what sounded like the screams of Judgment Day, but no- it was about 5000 people on the stairwell having a party with blaring music. I didn't even try to ask them to carry their merry-making elsewhere, I just called the police. Anyway, homework calls. Ramadan Mubarak everyone!

The End is Near!

2006-05-03T17:18:00.000-07:00

Three more finals and I shall be done with my first year of college. Hopefully, I will be able to graduate a year, or at least a semester, early. Then it's off to med. school, assuming I get through the MCAT unscathed.......... that is looking far ahead, but OU has been an excellent experience so far. High school got old rather quickly, and though I enjoyed the atmosphere and camaraderie of my AP classes, graduating was a pleasant release.... Now, back to studying; I have a chemistry final on Monday and don't fancy spending my entire weekend devoted to it, as I will be moving most of my things back home on Friday.

To Wed or not To Wed

2006-04-03T21:54:00.000-07:00

I am no longer a teen and it seems that every time I turn around someone is asking me if/when I am going to marry or says something like," InshaAllah you will marry a good man,".....my little sisters, my aunt, strangers at the store....Most days I feel pretty indifferent towards marriage, then sometimes.... I know that it's something I want, but it's just hard to imagine how it'll work out. Maybe I am kinda stuck on the Western mindset, because part of my ambivalence is that I don't LOVE anyone, so how can I consider marriage? Now I know that it takes more than love, just look at the 60% divorce rate to see where True Love leads. There's also the education/career issue. I am gonna be in school for at least 2 more years, then there's med. School, then a few years of residency. Now, assuming that my marriage is blessed with children, what shall happen then? I was reading someone's blog and she was talking about how she homeschools her kids and how wonderful it is, and I thought, "I want to do that, oh, wait, I am going to be a doctor, how will I ever be able have to time to raise my kids, let alone homeschool them?" So now it's the Mommy War. Anyone who knows me is aware of my great love for children, I just cannot get enough of babies. I really want to be there while my kids grow up, how can I be a pediatrician, taking care of other people's kids and neglect my own? Ah, I dunno, maybe I am stressing needlessly, not all female doctors are childless, right?......anyway, it is time for bed, I just have to trust to Allah that whatever happens has a reason.

2006-03-23T18:10:00.000-08:00

All day long I think up new posts that are clever and witty, and yet profound. But as soon as I drag my laptop the 2 feet from my desk to that tortuously uncomfortable slab of plastic and cheap stuffing also known as a dorm-room bed, the posts disappear from my head.................My baby cousin has mostly recovered, alhamdulilah. Things always look better at the start of spring. We had some snow this morning, but it quickly melted and tomorrow is supposed to be 58 degrees! Yay for skirt weather. I get tired of wearing pants in the winter.........Oklahoma has beautiful Springs. The redbud trees are in bloom and the grass turns a gorgeous green, birds chirp and squirrels go crazy. I always shake my head at the students who scurry across the road when the "Don't Walk" light is on. It's not that I am a stuffy bureaucrat, but I wonder at their rush. What's wrong with standing outside for a moment? People act like they can actually save time, put away little extra bits of it for later use. All we have is now, "Later" is an illusion that we are not guaranteed. Instead of standing for a minute and witnessing the miracle of Life before their very eyes as trees blossom and and flowers bloom, they dash through the world, iPods obstinately stuck in their ears, blocking out the real music.

2006-03-21T20:06:00.000-08:00

I know that I need to submit a new post. Unfortunately, I have a zoology midterm Thursday morning, so I need to study like whoa. Thursday night, then, shall be the date of a real entry, finally.

2006-03-01T19:41:00.000-08:00

I have been deeply disturbed by world events lately. I have been losing my faith in humanity and despairing, will peace ever come? But then I realize that this world is not meant to be peaceful, it is a test, and those who cause discord will be judged. My cousin in Iraq was killed. He had been married for less than 2 years and had a 4-month old baby....... My baby cousin, Ghadeer, is in the hospital with RSV. We are all so fragile, our bodies are prone to destruction by the smallest of organisms, and our lives can be taken in an instant by one misguided soul. But what is strong, resilient, that is our faith. These days it's all that I have. Inna Lillah illayhi Rajaon.

2006-01-31T18:53:00.000-08:00

I got this quiz from Sister Scorpion. 'Tis fairly accurate. I decided a few months ago that I was a Romantic-Existentialist, which is an unlikely combintion, but it works for me.
You scored as Cultural Creative.
Cultural Creatives are probably the newest group to enter this realm. You are a modern thinker who tends to shy away from organized religion but still feels as if there is something greater than ourselves. You are very spiritual, even if you are not religious. Life has a meaning outside of the rational.

Cultural Creative
88%
Romanticist
75%
Existentialist
63%
Idealist
63%
Fundamentalist
56%
Postmodernist
56%
Modernist
44%
Materialist
13%

2006-01-21T17:16:00.000-08:00

My friends have often told me that before we became friends they thought I was snobbish and stuck-up. This always exasperates me because I hate beng so misunderstood. I just don't require a plethora of chattiness and social friends to make me feel good about my life. I have always been this way. Until the age of six I spoke to virtually no one but my mother. People told her that I was retarded.... yah, I graduated high school with 28 college credit hours.
I am the type of person that enjoys her solitude. I love people, but I have no objection to being by myself sometimes. I find that on the whole people who have a gazillion friends and are constantly with them really don't know who they are outside of their peers. I am blessed, alhamdulilah, I know who I am. I realize this is intimidating to most people and so they think that I must most certainly be a taciturn, unfriendly girl who has a superiority complex. But those who think thus really don't know me. I am probably the most sensitive, compassionate person ever....ok, maybe not ever, but I am definitely up there, probably top ten. I adore babies and something as simple as the sunrise or the glowing moon bring tears to my eyes at the beauty and perfection of God's creation
I think that I must be on a higher moral, mental, and emotional plane than most of my peers, which is not to say that I think I am better, per se. It's just that the mundane tasks with which they seek to bring ephemeral satisfaction into their lives I see for what they are- pointless nonsense that hurt the soul, body, and mind.
Maybe that does make me a snob,but I am probably a better person for it.

2006-01-19T15:24:00.000-08:00

I learned in my junior year that the world goes to greater and greater entropy, entropy being a state of disorder. It's a law in science. Man contructs the great Amphitheatre; Nature wears it down, breaking the nice, ordered structure down. Lately it feels like the world is nothing but disorder. We are ravaged by war, poverty, disease, corrupt governments, and natural disasters. It's always been the plan for me to become a doctor, to help people and change the world. Over the break I watched a documentary on orphans in Africa. In South Africa alone over 750,000 children have been orphaned because of AIDS. I silently sobbed as I watched those tiny kids caring for siblings, walking miles to fetch water to drink, and completely alone. A few days later I watched on satellite a whimpering toddler who was injured in the bombings in Karbala. And I felt the weight of their burdened lives pressing down on my heart. How am I to help? I feel so utterly powerless to change the situation.

Back to Schoooool!

2006-01-16T20:44:00.000-08:00

I just got back to my dorm! I had to carry 8 million pounds of junk 20 miles from the parking lot to my building. I am so spent. Zoology at 10:30 am, yea.

Concerning Pants

2006-01-07T20:11:00.000-08:00

Boys, boys, boys. What is the issue with the pants?

They should not be falling off your bottom. Their purpose is to cover that, alongwith your legs. So get some that fit! And why, why do you put on a belt if you are going to let the pants hang way low? Tell me what the point is, please. Here's a general rule: if you have to walk like a penguin to prevent the public from viewing what's private, get some different pants!

Girls' pants are for girls. I don't understand where the confusion is coming from; perhaps your mommies didn't give you the talk, so I will. Boys and girls are made differently, so boys' and girls' pants are made differently (crazy, I know). Wear you own freakin' pants!

Ok, there's my ranting for awhile, it has been a long time coming.

Forever Young

2006-01-01T19:23:00.000-08:00

I am going to be twenty soon, no more excuses to be moody and teenager-like. I feel a wee bit wistful about it. But then, I suppose that I never was a typical teenager as I have always been quite mature.

I have a drinking problem. And I mean that in the simplest sense. Somehow I almost always spill whatever I am drinking all over my self. I need a Sippee cup. Or a bib.

There's proof that one can always be youthful. :)

Salam!

2005-12-25T18:51:00.000-08:00

I got bored with Xanga, it is way too teenybopper for me.